I can see the pain in his eyes, I wish I could say it was mirrored in my own but its not, instead I almost feel relief, I know now, there is no hope. I’m dying.
Phlox tells us its only a matter of time, a day at the most, more likely hours, the poison is seeping slowly through my system, nothing anyone does can stop that.
I don’t want to hurt him, part of me tells me to give it up, let him go now before he has to watch me die, but in all honesty I’m to selfish for that, I need him with me.
I tell him not to cry, that its alright, that I’m alright, I am dying knowing I am truly loved, and knowing what it is like to have truly loved another person, that is the most important thing in the universe to me, something I have never had before, and that he has given me, because of him I can die content and happy.
It hurts deep inside me I can feel the poison working, my muscles starting to waste away, my organs starting to fail, my blood flowing slower as my heart rate falls, and less oxygen makes it’s way to my brain.
I watch him watching me, his eyes tearing up and I smile at him, I have to smile, because if I don’t I will cry, and I must be strong now, for him.
I tell him I love him, that I will always love him for all eternity through time, space and death, nothing will ever change that.
I feel it coming, I feel my last breath, the last beat of my heart, the last touch of his lips against mine, and so as I slip of into oblivion I smile, and one whisper passes my lips, “I love you Trip”.
Darkness surrounds me, nothing is in this place, but even as the darkness closes in I hear it… “I love you too, Jon.”