Contrary to popular belief, Dr. Peter Kavanagh had not been spawned from a pond creature. He was not cold, heartless or evil. He had a mother, a father, two sisters and when he was a kid he'd had a dog named Rex. He liked science and he wore big glasses, but he was tall and could net a ball like no one else in junior high, so when he should have been relegated to the 'geek' table he'd sat with the jocks.
He was contrary never quite what one might expect, but then he'd grown up and he'd been in university at sixteen and it was a different world where he could never quite fit in no matter what he tried and alone he'd hidden in numbers and science until even he had trouble remembering who he'd once been when the other kids had cheered him on to a winning game point or he'd gone to the dance with the most popular girl in school and now a million plus light years from home, it hardly mattered anyway.
Even if it had mattered, he wasn't sure he remembered how to be liked anymore, how it felt to laugh and joke with friends, or too just have someone to *talk* too, who wasn't paid for it. Not that Hightmeyer wasn't perfectly *nice* but she was a little condescending, too him at least and he didn't like it.
So he worked and slept, he worked and slept, occasionally when it all got too much and he was just too… alone… he'd go to the gym, in the middle of the night while most of Atlantis, or as much of it as ever did, was asleep and work out until he could barely move and then he'd sleep and work, work and sleep. Over and over, day in and day out.
He'd felt almost normal once, back on Earth, at the SGC, he'd actually had a friend, although, he was never entirely certain how it had happened, but it was nice. Until friendship had become more and his 'friend' freaked out, because even if the SGC wasn't like other military bases it was still military and so was his friend, so he'd left and run all the way to the Pegasus Galaxy
And here he was, light years from home, from family, without a single person he could call friend and the Wraith were coming. Frankly he didn't care if he sounded like a coward who wanted to run hard and fast, he wanted to live, he had to live, to get back to Earth someway, somehow because as the Wraith got closer he began to realise what he hadn't before, he wasn't alone, he had someone, someone who despite everything (adherence to stupid military rules for example) cared about him.
Okay technically had *dumped* him, but that could be overlooked because it was *love* and they could work around it, he just had to get back to Earth in one piece and the rest would sort itself out. Over and over, he told himself this, over and over until the Wraith were gone and he was still standing, he could go back to Earth, back to Evan. That was all that mattered.